Use soap when washing…?

The kids are getting bit older now and we are starting to try to get them to be a bit more autonomous. I think in millennial / gen z language it is now termed as being “resilient”.

Bath time with the kids used to be so much fun. All the kids in the bath tub splashing about for hours on end.

 

 

But sadly that era is drawing to an end.

 

 

 

The kids now are given the responsibility to wash themselves. They have been left unsupervised for a few months now. begrudgingly they even have a shower. Which was a struggle to convince them that this was not such a horrible experience. And it had the added benefit of reducing our water bill.

Everything was going well. The kids would be told to go and have a shower and they would merrily run off to the bathroom. This had been going on for several months.

“number 2 it’s your time for a shower. I think you need to wash your hair this time.” I suggested one evening.

“ok” was the reply from number 2.

“use the shampoo for your hair and not the soap” I thought it was best to clarify the difference.

“That’s ok as I don’t use the soap” number 2 affirmed

“errr. Do you mean you never use soap or just not for your hair?” I was starting to get that worried feeling again

“no. never use the soap in the shower” number 2 looked at me as though I was stupid

“hhhmm, so when you wash in the shower do you use any soap? I was just trying to clarify my misunderstanding

“oh. Did you want me to wash with soap?”

“yes. The soap helps clean you. Not just the water.” I was beginning to see my error. “so all this time you haven’t been using soap?”

“well you didn’t say I should use soap.” Number 2 looked hurt.

“well, can you use soap. On your body.”

i’ll Wash your mouth out with soap

Modern discipline is a bit different than in the good old days. The kids come back from school with a fridge magnet with the Childline phone number.  A constant reminder for beleaguered parents to stay on the straight and narrow – or else.

And the language of the kids is appalling. All this modern hip hoppy music. ABBA would never have dared.

After a recent lapse from No1, it was time to take action. Warnings had been given. She was testing me. Curious to see if dad would follow through.

The trouble with kids now is they try to take things to the edge and don’t understand that a threat has to be carried out. Otherwise it’s meaningless. They’ll cotton on pretty quickly. And then you’re really in trouble.

Boom. Pushed me over the edge. Enough is enough. Better to nip things in the bud nice and early.

The Wife was curious, probably puzzled. Did this happen north of the Watford Gap. I don’t think they did proper disciple in her family. New age liberals.

Got hold of No1. A bit of nervous laughter, probably thought dad won’t actually do it. He knows about Childline. Under estimated dad. Big time.

At the sink there’s a fair bit of wriggling. Actually quite difficult to keep a grip and get a lather up at the same time.

Unfortunately, posh soap doesn’t taste as bad as the soap in the olden days. When they made it natural and ethical they may have had potty mouthed children in mind.

But ever since the language has been perfect. Even with posh soap.