Our kids aren’t really fussy eaters. We try to give them a taste of everything. and persist but after a fair few goes we do finally give in. They don’t do too badly. fruit is a bit tricky, but the real issue is mushrooms.
Number 1 used to love them. from an early age she couldn’t get enough of them.
Gran, who loves to pretend that she is giving them healthy food latches on to the latest fruit or veg they show an interest in and plies it down their throats. which is then followed up by loads of “treats”, ‘cos they did so well.
This time it was mushrooms.
one lunch she had made a plate full of mushrooms, thinly sliced and lightly sautéed.
Gran was very proud, number 1 was wolfing them down. mouthfuls of them. it didn’t look like they were being chewed a lot.
there must have been an overload some where between number 1’s mouth and stomach.
Before we knew it a projectile mass of semi-digested but intact mushrooms returned into the plate. there were also some extra bits. but pretty much it was the previous contents that had come back. that just smelt a bit bad.
number 1 has never eaten mushrooms since. and we haven’t really pushed it.
one of the useful things about having 2 kids, is that when the eldest gets given a competitive challenge at school, you have a second bite of the cherry with number 2.
well, the 4 wheel 2 axle challenge came around for a second time.
we had learnt a lot from the first time.
the “best colour scheme” trophy was a false hope. We had to go for broke and not rely on the vagaries of a colour blind judge who still thinks lava lamps are hip. we were going to break some sort of land speed/distance record this time.
there had been a bit of churn in the competition, Mr Forumula 1 had departed, Team laser had lost interest, but Fusion reactor was still about and getting cagey about his latest effort.
But we had resurrected the test ramp, and invested in some fancy axle lube. this time there would be no superfluous drivers with un-aerodynamic hair – just a finely tuned, low friction vehicle capable of heading in an optimal straight line.
This was my last chance of taking this title home. There were no more kids in the pipeline. At all.
we did lots of testing, different weights, different axles, different lengths.
we had a good formula. testing had gone well.
but we had to make one compromise – it didn’t look very nice. and everyone could see inside the transparent lemonade bottle. and check out our ballast distribution to optimise down force and axle load.
i succumbed to number 2’s demand for a makeover. we went for a multi-coloured stripey effect. sort of go-faster-stripes on acid.
The big day came. bright sunshine, even a bar was laid on. apparently the PTA had received a few comments about the lack of adult refreshment. In these tense high octane sporting events a bit of light refreshment is necessary. and i think the PTA sensed it was easy money.
Mr tannoy was in full flow.
the competition had upped its game. lots of streamlined racers. not many kids did this years entrants.
there seemed to be a food theme going on. Mr Fusion reactor had gone for what looked like a Paella. There was a fairy cake (cupcake if you want). a sort of squid like fish thing. it was a competitive looking assortment.
the first few where well short of our test run distances. we were feeling like it could be our day.
Cup cake put in a pretty good effort. but we had more in the tank. we were sure.
we got the call. a quick check of the wheels, a final dab of lube. all in order.
these few seconds would define our primary school experience.
3-2-1 go!
number 2 let it go down the ramp.
it was a great launch down the ramp. good momentum. the trajectory was straight. things were looking good. the spectators had to scuttle out of the way as the track wasn’t long enough. the crowd was cheering. they could sense it was something special.
the distance was good, but just a bit of a veer to the right spoiled what was a very very good run.
I caught the eyes of a few parents – that approving look – nice effort.
the only real contender was Paella Express – Mr Fusion reactor.
Paella express takes gold. number 2 gets silver. cup cake bronze.
Due to the enormous quantity of hedge plants required and the lack of IMF scale funding needed to fill the gaps, my plans to restore the territorial boundaries called for an Industrial hedge growing plan.
Cuttings was the obvious answer. But we needed a place to grow them. And a big area.
1 tonne of top soil, plenty of well decomposed horse manure (from the field next door), some old planks, and a couple of days forced labour from the unwilling kids saw the architectural master piece constructed.
The Wife suggested that it didn’t look that nice. The gardens of Versailles it is not, but it is in the back of an overgrown field in the middle of nowhere and only cost a bit of arm twisting for the labour and a bag of nails.
But I think the Wife got into the swing of it when we had to collect the cuttings and start to plant them. Plenty of nice neat rows.
Just hope some of them actually grow and can be transplanted next year.
